when a 14 year old is judging you, you know you've had too much to drink
Isn't that the only thing she's good at? Complaining and blow jobs?
Dude sorry but it totally wasn't worth going back in there for yous shoes
Woke up in an unfamiliar pair of underwear, running shoes but no socks, and a cowboy hat. Thank you crown royal
I'm just sayin' man be careful, that chick has castration written all over her.
The worst thing about it is now I have to find someone else to fuck in the library.
You will never know an awkward moment until your parents pick you up from a one night stand.
He told me he deactivated his facebook because his girlfriend caught him wackin it to my profile picture.
10 points to you
I am not betting on the failure of any friend that is not you.
May 25th. Drunk Laser Tag party to celebrate our bdays. May 26th. Mushrooms at Chattanooga Aquarium. Damn
Pretty sure I'm about to get another tattoo. It'll have mom in there somewhere for Mother's Day.
I'm gonna hop on that dick and ride it into the sunset
I'm on the couch watching HGTV googling giant boob Halloween costumes so life is swell
He's going to be in the air guitar championships in june. Need I say more.
so we’ve decided to fuck for our own health
Randomize
