i'm so high i feel like the people i'm chatting with online can some how see that i'm naked.
i have only one word for you: 3somewithnorwegiangirls
seeing two hook-ups in tagged in the same picture will send chills down anyone's spine.
Just a smidgen more estrogen and shed be golden
She's got a legit dose of dude going on
No kidding. All she needs is a cheek full of chewing tobacco and I'd have fucked John wayne.
You crossed every boundary on the boundary spectrum last night. You're like the illegal immigrant of drunk actions. No more holiday drinking for you.
I gave him my yeast infection. HOW THE FUCK DOES THAT EVEN WORK?
I'm beginning to worry that I seem to get along best with people when I'm naked with them.
I can't figure out how to eat twizzlers and I have to be at a wedding reception in an hour.
Please never have kids.
I just wanna be able to fart and do my homework but he won't leave
I witness him finger a girl behind the dj decks yet I'm still going to meet up with him. Wtf is my life
Hey, sorry for threatening to teabag your mom to death last night
I just want to get drunk and not have to worry about you leaving me at the bar.
Just sold our expired ticket for a free night of bowling to a drunk guy downtown for 50 bucks. Ill buy beer on my way home
This is the nicest bathroom I've ever been drunk in. The urinal is gold.
wait you like me?? for my personality??
I know I was surprised too
Randomize