I think your mom looks like a breed of donkey and elephant, but her boobs are perfect
I didnt pay $190 for a fake with a new middle name of Vane..
the chair was smiling at me in sociology and i had to try not to burst out laughing.
Your kinda stuck between a rock and his hard dick on this one..
Honestly, it was easier to just put it in my mouth than to deal with an awkward conversation.
We need to stop celebrating holidays that dont belong to us
i broight you flpweers amd vodka. open yoir bask door
This is your typical drubkba Amy test. Shout out to jisus for auto correct
Uh no. you let me handle it. trust me: I can paint the Mona Lisa in tints of bitch.
Guess who is playing his new drum set when his roommate gets home to teach her a lesson about binge drinking to the point of being taken to the emergency room?
I fell in the river last night. The allegheny to be exact. Omg getting drunk at work gatherings is dangerous
I'm really glad I had vomit on my sweater when I met his sister.
Just come home. We will have sex and Taco Bell. I'm feeling wild, I put on temporary tattoos.
Shit is getting real. I just adjusted my search radius for my dating profile to ANY FUCKING WHERE
For someone I see at the bar by herself all the time... I should have know she had a tazer.
Randomize
