if this week's events in iraq have taught me anything, it's that when pulling out, always expect a mess...
he was going down on me when he saw the warts...nevertheless he told me he had to pick his sister up from school. why does this keep happening to me???
been sitting in chapter for 25 minutes. drinking last night's franzia out of a XXX vitamin water 10 bottle. recruitment chair has no idea. life is good.
its time for step 4 of getting over him: post his number on the transvestite page on craigs list asking for pics
I still love him regardless of his misguided forays into heterosexuality
i just found this napkin with your number on it in my jacket pocket. it reads amy, drawing of a wine bottle and a house
you ate the make a wish sign. Like actually chewed on it. It was our solution to going outside when the cops were there
New Mean Girls drinking game: Everytime someone says Africa or Math, chug.
We got hammered last night and I woke up this morning with texts from 'iron maiden chick.' wtf?
High-fiving last weekend's hook up in passing on the way to class has given me quite the lady boner.
I tried to steal a Mike's Hard sign last night but it didn't work out
why what happened?
Well it was going fine.. until the bouncer noticed the three foot steel lemon sticking out of my jacket.
I'm home, and it turns out she didn't get it all. still picking Oreos out of my pubes.
If my dick was big enough to fuck the eye of a hurricane, I would.
When I woke up I had 6 missed calls making sure I was ok and asking if I remember showing my tits to a picture of her baby.
You sat outside petting a picture of your cat for hours... not even the real thing... just a picture.
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