I cannot believe you needed a note to remind yourself to ask me about the fourteen sleeping Mexicans.
i would have smoked before this dance, how ever i have surgery Monday and I looked up weed and anesthesia and fatalities was mentioned, so i decided that it would be a bad idea
probs a good idea
i like the whole idea of life and being alive
you sure you're not high?
Question: Is it too early to claim April Fools on the text "can we do some lines before the concert" that I accidentally sent Mom?
facebook friend requested him the morning after while he was still asleep in my bed, a whole new level of creeper even for me
I didn't even realize you were getting that drunk until bam!
is bam when I fell down the stairs or when I threw up standing at the bar?
Cause your way of greeting people at the club was grabbing a tit and jiggling it while yelling a name, which usually wasn't theirs, and guys weren't safe either.
So my niece decided to play "lets make shapes out of your bruises" with me and told me that one of them looks like a shark bite. Bravo, sir. Bravo.
Ok I'm good with that cause I'm gonna disappear for 90 days
Are you goin to rehab again?
Please, take the 2 shots of vodka that I left as an apologie.
Nothing says besties like laying naked in bed hungover arguing over who is getting the pants
It took me three days, but I managed to nearly get arrested on my way out of LA. Made it to the airport. Crisis averted, though. The real crime is, my flight is delayed two hours.
I remember looking at his body and thinking wow you have a body sculpted by Jesus himself. Still not sure if I said that out loud or not
It must have been good head...he put down the Xbox controller
Last nights hook up turn into a star wars history lesson.. He's luck y he's pretty..
EMERGENCY SUBJECT CHANGE. SHE DOESN'T KNOW.
Randomize
