honestly if we didnt hate the same people we would have a friendship based on nothing
I'm taking last night back. It officially didn't happen. Tell your friends.
my history teacher totally just suggested that we record his lectures and play drinking games with them later so that we pay attention to the material.
I walked into his living room and saw him watching the play-offs while eating tomato paste out of the can with a bottle of wine. I'm telling you to stop talking to him. now.
You paid the taxi driver with a comb last night.
So i was told that i peed in the sink, had sex with a pillow and banged on a washer while singing idian chants
They called me at 5 AM saying they had a present for me
there's a photo set of like seven dicks covered in glitter....i don't know what to do
i tried giving myself a bikini wax.1. i hate you 2. i think i'm dying
Tim is a child that you physically can't love because he makes it hard for you to even find anything redeeming about him so you debate leaving him forever at the gas station.
Oh shit that's not good dude. I'd head straight for Williamsport hospital the first ingredient in that shit is lithium batteries. You don't want to know what the second one is
I'm not saying I love you. I never said I love you. I said that if earth blew up like Krypton you'd be the only person I would like to have inside me when our bodies burn up in a fiery inferno
He's getting so into these sexts, I hate to tell him I'm fully clothes, watching Bring It On and eating chips and salsa.
Dude just saw some some guy puke out of a car window on the highway going to school.
THE SUN DOESNT SET TIL 647 YAAAAASSSSSSSSSS. Goodbye seasonal depression hello regular depression
Randomize
