I want to have your abortion
I asked what she wanted from Hawaii. She said a baby like Aaden from JK 8.
where am I supposed to find one of those?
I woke up this morning and the first thing i saw was the harry potter tattoo on his left butt cheek.
i wish i could google "things to eat in my fridge" so i wouldnt have to go downstairs and be disappointed
All i've done since I got back to my room today is take a three hour nap. Like, I even planned to change my pants and haven't even done that yet.
don't tell me about being eco-friendly. i just threw up in the same bag i bought my liquor in. RECYCLING
I thought 4 percs were too many but I'm dumping Gogurt on apple pie and taking giant bong rips. This feels right.
For the sake of my mom, I can't sleep with two guys with the same name. She has a hard enough time keeping up as it is
Did you have ill-advised lesbian sex on the deathbed of their relationship?
Of course. Go big or go home.
You're my fucking queen.
Can you masturbate to someone liking your instagram picture?
Don't forget to bring $1s for the strippers. Make it rain!!!!
Thanks, mom, will do
There we go, I shall begin my attempt to achieve whore status today
I think I’ve been affected by his dad mustache. I wanna ride it.
how does that bad decision feel?
i had sex with a girl named after a fruit last night and it was the best thing to happen to me in 2020
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