This guy told us that for a dollar and two cigarettes he'd let Megan stomp on his crotch. We were gonna refuse, but we figured someone had to keep him from passing his stupid genes along.
I always feel awkward when im sitting at home watching the price is right and the fat contestant get the gym equipment.
I am choosing my outfit based on how fast I can get it off. Please help.
dude i doubt hes gay
I CAUGHT HIM BEATING OFF TO MENS HEALTH!
A picture just appeared on facebook. I am puking in the toilet, you are next to me puking in the sink. I think we have our christmas card.
i just wasnt prepared to have the baby of one of two french firemen. threesomes are too confusing.
Just walked into McDonald's and a bunch of fat girls gave me a look like I just entered their territory.
He stopped responding after the animal pictures... I do this EVERY TIME.
What's life without a pregnancy scare?
Is Oprah even human
He could only go see Deadpool without his girl if he was black-out drunk... because spoilers. They're the perfect couple.
I'm glad you found someone that both loves you and is cool doing coke off your tits. Proud of you.
final thoughts: i just want someone into choking me out, weed and anime
Her hot older sister walked in on us, looked me up and down, then stared straight at her and said "I call sloppy seconds on this one" then left. I'm still debating on how I feel about that.
After this weekend my vagina will follow his penis anywhere. It’s like the pied piper, but with penis
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