You did that once after drunk driving from a photo shoot
That was very cool/italian of you
Which brings me to my next point, how come italians are so well adapted to drunk driving
I dont get it-she has sex with me but wont be my facebook friend?
My little brother got home at 4am too, we drunk ate together. It was a kodak moment.
Tequila is the liquid version of celery. I lose more calories during tequila drunk and the following sexual activities than I gain by drinking it...
Leaving the phone at home last night was the best decision I ever made.... Though I still managed to text her and now I have 2 phones...
I gave an inspirational speech to a bum and called a bride ugly at her wedding reception.
He handled me like a finger puppet on crack... Time to ice the vagina, I'd like to sit down sometime today.
What a dumb baby whore.
You need a Jiminy Cricket, but for sexual decisions.
I feel that the drunker I get, the drunker Facebook gets.
Bitch, it's 2 in the afternoon.
we were making out in my truck and while she was straddling me she informs me that she jerks off horses for a living. Should I be concerned or flattered?
I think he might be using me for sex. I also think I might be ok with that.
We watched X-Files, ate pizza, and he played with my butt. It was a pretty standard Monday.
I did not pay that kind of money so that It could be hidden. that bra needs to shine in glory so that it can be seen by the world.
Yeah I'm just gonna stay here and spread my horniness to the world.
Randomize
