i think the next time he gets me off i'm going to scream bangarang
ru fi oooo
he drunkenly confessed to whacking off before coming over so the sex'd be longer. this one's a keeper
He went so fast i didnt even have time to pretend like i was about to have a fake orgasim
life is no where near the amusement park it was when I was on Vicodin.
Making a drinking game out of jeopardy does not mean you studied..
I lost it last night. That was humiliating. Cincinnati is now covered in my puke.
My fingers feel amazing. Their going like 100 MPH!!
HOLY SHIT. SHIT THAT IS HOLY. HOLY OF THE SHIT.
Nothing says never again like hurling in the shower.
Is eating fries while lying on the floor bad for you?
If I choke and die at least I will have been doing something I love
You were fine, but your knee injury definitely came from interpretive dancing like a gay fairy with lead wings all around the Mission St BART. Everyone thought you were on drugs.
The notification you get from snapchat that someone took a screenie is like a formal declaration of blackmail.
Yes I am wallowing. There is a significant lack of cookie dough
I swear to god....if you can give yourself a brazilian you can take a fucking bullet
he really is such a sweet guy. it’s a shame i have to break his heart.
you said something about joining a k-pop band before passing out topless on the trampoline.
Randomize
