The guy I fucked in the port a poty just called me and asked me on a date!
Awkward!
No he was cute and I said yes!
coming out of a blackout being surrounded by Disney police was not as awesome as it sounds.
Well, he has like 3 girlfriends but I think I could be polygamist for that dick.
i found him! he's on the front porch using a bag of potting soil as a pillow. i forgot i left him there.
I drink more single than I do in relationships. Except with assface.
The reign of the rally queen is over. Welcome to the age of the walking dead.
I'm petty sure you said "hold on let me make my nipples hard, they look better"
I will give you the couch, a small portion of the fridge, and plenty of beer.
Got my future figured out. I'm oddly comforted. Thanks, bro.
My butt remains clenched, sir.
Oh god it's open bar.
Now just crop his dad out and add it to the spank bank.
So if he doesn't show up do we eat his birthday cake? Because I'm stoned and wrestling is on. What's the proper protocol
boys just don't understand what they're missing out on.
he's missing out on my boobs looking marvelous this evening.
I seriously just rolled a joint on my high school diploma. I feel like I've come so far.
He told me that I should keep my socks on next time because he read somewhere that it'll help me orgasm...
Randomize
