do you think it i'm gay because i was in a 3 way lastnight?
well not if you dont touch the other dude and concentrate on the chic
what chic?
thats it. im googling how to make you boobs smaller. this is getting out of control.
I need to stop coming to work sober
it was the least impressive dick i've ever seen... and i've changed babies' diapers.
How do i tell my boyfriend " I'm taking the two weeks im in Europe to fuck my way across 9 countries" in a way where we will still be together?
New term. "Find a husband" fridays. It's like thirsty thursdays, but with a dowry.
some guy had a sword and everyones crying..it turned bad..fast.
He's cheating on his wife, and he's judging me for eating McDonalds
pregamed for the floor meeting. so stoned. i keep thinking my RA is shrinking.
Liz is crying about burritos again.
my make-up looks really good tonight. I swear it had nothing to do with me finishing all of your strawberry vodka.
As much as I enjoyed playing drunk half naked twister and talking about my daddy issues last time, I'll have to pass.
Yea I went out in footie pajamas and still got laid. Good night for u?
Somehow I went from sitting in a car upside down to waking up in the grass surounded by paramedics. It was a great night.
Also, in case they didn’t tell you… there is a chicken living in your old room… so I would assume cleaning that is now on them
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