Would you like to blur the lines between friendship and lesbianism tonight?
considering how much of last night I don't remember and the amount of ones laying on my desk right now, it's safe to say I'm concerned
I usually would've stopped there but I kinda remember opening the bottle of vodka, and we ALL know that's when things go downhill.
woke up this morning in the hall outside of my parents room with a sign taped to myself that said "im sorry"...
I know it's not standard practice to meet the couple you donate to, but i'm curious as to what kind of people saw my picture and said, we want that girl's eggs
There's no point in calling it Big Titties Tuesday if girls with big tits don't get anything special
can't decide if i look like a hooker or a missing member of Poison today
can I share that I'd like to fuck him in my new car as a sort of car warming present to myself?
And then we will celebrate by drinking and making fun of him. As per usual.
I have tan lines from my nipple rings.
So bored. I think I've expelled every last gram of jizz from my body.
I just want every freshman guy to know about Grindr just so I can have more options
You answered, dry heaved into the phone twice, & then hung up on me.
He was so drunk we almost didn't even make it to his place because he didn't know where he lived
Ugh. My life is a never ending cycle of bad decisions and taquitos.
Randomize
