we're microwaving frozen margaritas its not the same without u
He had to pee in the sink beside my head because the girl that I was taking care of was passed out on the toilet. To answer your question: yes i took a peek. Thats why we hooked up later.
you left your shoes but remembered to take your vodka. i see where your priorities are.
There was a suspicious looking plate that suggests I may have eaten salad with gravy
the water pistols in the freezer are full of voddka.
How is it that you get into at least one taco related fight a year?
she texted me out of nowhere. and I wanted to get drunk. like I didn't even have her new number until 6 hours ago and bam we were rolling around drinking cotton candy vodka from the bottle she had stuffed in a boot
It was fun, but I mean, any day that starts with shower tequila is bound to be good.
Ummmm you know you're drinking vodka out of a Skittles bag, right?
Remember that time I got suspended in eighth grade, well it was like that but I was on acid and wearing goggles
You've never sent a girl a dick pic?
Call me old fashioned
I just really wish I could go back and unsex him. Waste of my vagina.
The frequency with which I change my vibrator batteries is getting a little ridiculous....
On the good side I got hit on by a cute college guy. But the bad side was having sex in a frat house for first time in 9 years
I just recommended that the library purchase the first major hentai with tentacle porn. Really, I'm doing everyone a favor.
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