It smells like weed.
We are in Boulder, Everything smells like weed.
ii just google-imaged 'sad turtle' and maggie gyllenhaal only came up once. what is the world coming to?
I got 70 on my final, or put differently, I got a "still graduating" on my final.
Do you think she hates me because I thought her roommate's name actually was Butterface?
She said " I'm going to get her back one day soon for putting extacy in my pop while I drove her to whislter" just a heads up.
whoa! who said he's my boyfriend?
Oops. Sorry. That guy you keep accidentally running into in public. And at home. And with your vagina.
shes wearing an ankle tracker so she should be easy to find
Just pee around me
Worst. Date. Ever. He peeled a layer of bread off his mini burger buns because they had "too many carbs".
Hey can you explain why there's a dissected coconut in my purse????
Can my mom come with to the bar? Prince just died and I feel like I need to take her out to cheer her up.
no offense but you looked like shit yesterday
tequila is unforgiving..
Abby there's no shame in reading porn. It takes more work than watching I suppose
My hands smell like vagina and ham.
He agreed to matching Christmas pajamas today, no guy does that for a girl he’s not seriously considering marrying.
Randomize