I hope you get used to having plenty of sperm because you're never gonna get any.
now i know why i became what i already was.
Gentlemen...shes not going to tie her self to the table...
Awesome morning. I just met my boyfriend's wife, should I have shaken her hand or was the hug a tad over the top?
My uncles bleeding, my brother has a black eye and my moms topless in the pool... How was your family cookout?
We can't all go after the girl with the low self-esteem
Buy Actually if the police need to find my body I'm on an air mattress in an apartment near a McDonald's that's all I see out dat Window
Walk of shaming into my apartment. No one to clap me in. Come home!
YOU CANT FOOL THE TOILET
I'm getting a car wash man. I am go get a car wash high.
He called me baby cakes during sex... Can U not
He sent me nudes and I told him he reminded me of Buffalo Bill.
We had sex on the bear rug. He said "you, me and the bear. This is bear-idise"
Idk woke up on the suite in someone else's clothing and actually broke my ankle
I told him I was going outside to throw up and I ended up passing out in the front yard in my underwear for 45 minutes. When I walked back inside he said "where have u been?". My husband ladies and gentlemen
Randomize
