I have demons in me.
AHHHH!!! note to self never google image chastity belt omfg
I just busted my ass on the ice in front of my entire AA meeting. As if being there wasn't embarrassing enough.
she just made some guy spank her... then made some chick take a running start and spank her.
You can't say "they have anal bleaching for that" and then just hang up
Fuck morning classes and our weekday drinking habits.
You keep saying things....but all I'm hearing is kegs
Nope. Daytime is texting time. Night time is you send me naked pictures time.
if I just puked into my own hand, but then cleaned it up quickly, quietly, and calmly, am I still a trainwreck?
he's the second guy to suck on my nipple in front of my friends that i haven't made out with.
I'm so lazy and tired i just want to cry and fall asleep in a bed of egg mcmuffins.
I think we've reached the point in the summer were we need to go back to school. I was so bored yesterday I nearly bought blow dart gun.
Like he's moved to LinkedIn creeping on me since he's blocked everywhere else & I'm just so confused does he think I'm going to post daily updates of my life on FUCKING LINKEDIN
What would I even say at the wedding? "Sorry that I still wouldn't sleep with you after four years of you trying...but hopefully my sister here isn't that stubborn" and give him an awkward pat on the back?
i have a lot of questions about the picture quality/lighting/motion/gravity of the balls...
Randomize
