Its official, cigarettes are now more expensive than weed
um i just went through the in-n-out drive thru and meant to ask for my cheeseburger animal style. turns out what i actually said was, can i get that cheeseburger doggy style? been a rough weekend.
you went around and groping mens pants to see "which was worthy" of you to go home with.
Did you write "I hope this gives you aids" on my box of capn crunch?
Let's turn this shoulder dislocation into a positive. Come to the hospital, bring some beers, let's party.
I want to be ashamed of the things we do this weekend
It's an "im going to have to shit with the lights off" type of morning
She's doing hand stands on the train as I type. Idk if I'm impressed it embarrassed. Or turned on.
She was touching herself and looking a shoes online. My debt is bad enough without bringing that hot mess into my life.
I have the WORST cramps EVER. I think this is gods way of saying 'you're welcome, last warning. stop being a slut.'
Can we go to the gas station to get cigarettes before we get drunk. It's hard enough to say Marlboro sober.
I remember puking but I don't remember where. PSA: don't go barefoot around the house
Rule 1: If any of us dies on a trip, the other two have to 'Weekend at Bernies' the shit outta that corpse...
You almost got us killed.
YOU’RE WELCOME FOR NAVIGATING YOU TO A ONCE IN A LIFETIME EXPERIENCE.
why is there a thong in the fridge-NOT MINE-and a half of a pickle on the stairs?!
I don't wear thongs. The picle was for dipping. Ill explain later. Lacy or plain thong ?
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