it sucked. he totally couldn't get it up. blamed it on never having cheated b4. Couldn't stop laughing. fuck.
i asked him to tell me something nice and he said "your vagina is really tight."
So she said she wears a diaper when she's on her period and I'm not going to lie, I kind of want to see the diaper.
guys are only as good as the porn they watch
dude thats like the second time shes peed on the couch at a party. we cant invite her anymore
And then. You beer bonged 3 tall boys. In a row. Fell into some kids lap. And pulled down my shirt trying to get up. Thank you for that. I got laid
I got woken up by a construction worker, turns out I was laying in a hallway, naked and wrapped in a matress pad. To answer your question no, I did not study for this test I got David Hasselhoff drunk
I'm all about sex. But even I know there will be a time to retire my junk. And that will be my 40th birthday, or whenever I'm hideous
Annnnd I didn't even notice there is a guy dancing in a jock strap beside me. That explains girls smiling at me
I didn't think four grown drunk men could cuddle on a twin size bed, but we found a way.
I just woke up to myself peeing the bed. Happy hump day! I'll never get married.
I found condoms in the back yard from you and your boyfriend. My house isnt a motel
How do I word.. " hey, I need you to fuck me really hard and see if you or I can feel my birth control. No worries, this is just an experiment." In a nice way without them feeling used.
It really hurts to walk. Any idea what happened to my hip?
So I hung out with an australian but woke up with a British man in my bed does that make me culturalized
Randomize
