gavin joseph was born around 1 oclock 9lbs 12oz... over 21 inches long
Thats what she said
before you smothered your pizza in mayo you blotted it with a napkin saying you were trying to watch your fat intake
I coulnt tell if he was cumming or if I was throwing up
just witnessed some guy trade his friend $5 and a condom for his keys.
oh good. ive just found out that i went downstairs at 6 am still blacked out and had a 30 minute conversation with my mom about the different ways to feed our dog
Get everyone out of their dorms and watch 3 girls do the walk of shame from my room.
There's always time for handjobs
Why do they give me cups on $8 pitcher night? I HAVE A PITCHER.
New level of stoned. My Terry's Chocolate Orange didn't 'whack-and-unwrap' so I ate it like an apple.
Celebrating anything "Eve" is never a good choice! I feel like my soul's been put in a blender on the "destroy" setting- in other news: Happy 4th of July
After seeing all of the pics during the trial, all I could think was "her vagina doesn't look THAT dangerous"
There is not enough whiskey in the world to get me through what happened on Pretty Little Liars tonight.
First world problems.
We both work at 8am and I have to shower but my roommate is passed out on our bathroom floor with the door locked. Merry Christmas.
At 10 PM you were shit faced in the kitchen makin nachos... Naked. I wasn't sure what to do besides walk away...
Sorry I missed your call earlier. I was getting high with my high school band teacher.
Randomize
