Just be blunt and say drink from my dick
I need a man. I think Im going to put myself on Craigs list since they caught the killer and all.
Do it and if you add naked pictures youll get an instant reply
Friends don't let friends fuck ugly girls. WALK AWAY FROM HER!
I remember having a drink with vegetables in it. They said it was a mojito, but it tasted like cabbage.
haha i love mojitos
ya and i hate cabbage
What's the procedure for failed threesomes? Do I friend her on facebook this morning?
Afterwards she curled up in my dog's bed and slept there all night
How mad was your dog?
i forgot to tell you that olivia sent me a text yesterday that the mormon girl got caught with weed in her vagina at school
Pregaming class all semester has made this final review session more like my introduction to the topic.
this is really not the time to pretend we have morals
I asked for a dramatic "funeral" look for my makeup. They judged me.
If you don't fuck me hard, rough, and senseless the minute we're alone in your room, I'm returning you to the boyfriend store
You were so stoked after landing that flip that you dropped acid with three random guys without hesitation
I ditched my one night stand in the hotel lobby. How did he add me on Snapchat?
I wish I could accurately explain the embarrassment of standing in your bathroom with women's nair on your ass waiting to get in the shower.
She dry humped my leg in the raw while I was still dressed, came, and then fell asleep on top of me. All I got was a bruised thigh. 2020 needs to end.
Randomize