It doesn't have to be a walk of shame...just pretend he took you to breakfast.
No one shows this much boob at breakfast
Apparently Chef Boyardee is the only guy I'm taking home tonight.
Does slim fast make a chocolate heart for valentines? If so that's what she's getting.
Hey guess what I got for Valentine's day? Debt and blue balls.
someone just puked in the library. they put up caution tape. i totally underestimated finals week.
that's what penises do
they tell lies.
did you come by the house last night? I found a half eaten corn dog in the mail box.
come help me. im curled up in the fetal position on the upper floor of the lib. please bring more caffeine or alcohol
its ok. its hell week the lib is a no judgment zone right now
I can't go to class, I have all this weed to sell
I think my liver has finally had enough and is going all Ashley-Judd-in-a-Lifetime-movie on me.
I can say with absolute certainty the only time we ever had a civil conversation was when we agreed we both liked pizza.
I just woke up butt-naked in bed with a guy I've never seen..I reached into my bag next to the bed to get my phone and found a bag of shrooms, a handle of vodka, and 600 dollars that I've never seen. what do I do
enjoy it.
Sorry, was sleeping. I heard a rumor that I had a hangover, so I just went with it...
he's such a nice guy...he deserves a bigger dick.
I tried to fuck you in my bathroom while my parents were in the next room. I am a clusterfuck of fun.
Randomize
