My nipple is on Facebook.
i bet if teenage jesus was here he would do a shot with me
this is the fifth day in a row i've woken up after 3 pm, hungover. I might die when snowmageddon is finally over and we have to go back to class. my liver wont know how to take it.
I want to give my boyfriend great head for his birthday...can i practice on you?
I really think we need to get on this Charlie Sheen bandwagon
She didn't need to know her brother was thrown out of a bar for getting head on the dance floor. You're a shit head.
I had a dream last night where I used the marginal product rule to figure out how much more hangover I got per sip of four loko, econ is taking over my life...
Katie told the cabby "when the boat docks I'm getting off with you"
if any part of your body has ever entered my vagina you are fucking obligated to speak to me if i so desire
Swear to god you say cuddle bunny one more time and honest to god I will sacrifice a bunny on the hood of your car
You need to finger her with the Spock hand sign since she loves Star Trek.
He does impressions. Handy knowing you can get fucked by one guy and pretend a group of celebrities is running a train on you.
I turn into such a nice and loving person when I take Vicodin
he's like the highest ranking tongue wizard i know.
I climbed to the top of a stripper pole and touched the ceiling. Accomplishment?
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