He's been sleeping iwht ***
Nooo
Yeah I don't even know how, she looks like her mom smoked crack while she was in the womb
And then hit her in the face with a shovel
i'm going to be honest, my vagina smells.
please take me off your list of people to text when you don't want to drink by yourself.
You'd think me telling him that I'm a lesbian would make him realize that I don't want to hook up with him.
And yes, in case u were wondering a 25 year old high school agriculture teacher did just hit on me At Walmart bc of my pinata
He told me since I'm into organics I should know his meat is known locally for its quality and hes hand raised it since age 13.
I just found a tail you can wear naked. Via a butt plug. Who ever said the internet was a good thing?
Ok, gonna go sleep cuz my brain wants to be smart and not follow my pussy into the danger zone
So then I proceeded to the kitchen to make my "specialty," which consisted of a frozen veggie burger topped with peanut butter. I guess he ate it too.
Where did this racoon skin hat, stop sign and bag full of tacos come from?
Narnia or $5 pitcher night either way
So far in the last ten minutes I have tried to pour cereal into a plate. Today's gonna be a great day.
I have a pair of clean panties in my purse. This is having your life together.
I'm currently trying to figure out a way to fill the bathtub up with mashed potatoes so when he comes over he'll know what's about to hit him..
Actually we have similar relationship styles aka no relationship... it could work
After we finish having sex, he smokes an honest to God pipe. It's like fucking a big, sexy Sherlock Holmes...
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