I was watching truelife I'm transgendered. This tranny already got a date a week after getting a vagina. I've had a vagina my entire life and can't get a date.
the level of his annoyance + every insult he makes = the closer I am to telling him im fucking his ex
I guess on the plus side everyone really, really enjoyed my nipple clamps
America approved of our night. A bald eagle flew over us at 7am
You've eaten a Lean Pocket for every meal for at LEAST 3 days now. Get your life in line.
he told her to call him "Frog Legs" and she still fucked him and not you.
She just fell in the river. Meet us downstream with the bottle.
Your girlfriend is in jail- I've just never been able to use that in a sentence before. Thank you both!
The best revenge is living well. Or pooping in his sunroof. Either or
He asked me if I remembered touching his police badge. awk.
I appreciate that you take the time to fix your typos even while masturbating
you were angry and didn't have anything else to throw so you threw a breakfast burrito...?
I almost had sex at the fire station last night and I need you to acknowledge all the awesomeness that is in that sentence.
listen I will take literally anything I can get my tiny gay fingers on
Shit. My boss is having me meet and greet with the new doc upstairs. Do you think his doctor powers will detect that I'm still high?
Randomize
