We video chatted for almost two hours. But I woke up with puke on my keyboard. The question of the day: were we still chatting when I vommed? No idea.
i just watched my husband get a prostate exam. sex is ruined for me.
Today a TA in one of my classes told me he thought I was 35 and going back to school as an adult learner. Alcohol is working me.
I'll go out only because I know the starving children in third-world countries would frown upon us if we let an hour of free sangria go to waste...
There are no words to adequately express my gratitude for sending me porn you found staring a former classmate.
i think that dennys waitress has my boxers
next photo in the 'cherished memories' series- Jess's bed. Note the vomit actually UNDER the pillows. shes a genius.
This is the third time that ive slept with him. He bought me more milk. I can feel the romance growing.
OH AND DAN PET MY CAT WHILE I WAS GIVING HIM HEAD
Some girl at my gym just tried to casually drop the fact she can kegel 3 lbs...
No more stories ab the wkend for co-workers... No one else found "and I didn't have pants on when I got home Saturday night" as funny as I did.
Ah that wonderful moment when you realise the bookmark you were using in a book you lent your mum is actually a receipt from a strip club
So you drank bourbon with cough syrup?
I still had a cough. It only makes sense
How the hell could he be confused. He had a naked girl running to him. I feel like he would enjoy that.
I'm sending you a dick pic. Ill tell the other ppl in this pancheros its cool
Don't send a pic of dick unless it's inside the burrito
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