You and your empty threats of no sex. Like.u.cud.hold.out.
Facebook really needs to add a bikini picture profile tab for girls, it would really save me countless amounts of time!
i want to give my vagina back to god and say no thank you
Today in class was pretty awsome. I dont feel like i have to throw up and im actually paying attention. This is a first for friday
She gave me a handjob while eating a mcdouble with mayo on the way home from the bars at 2 in the morning. Car was full of people. This could be forever
It's gonna be pretty hard to find a homeless person that takes crackers as currency.
He showed up drunk to my cousions HS grad party, we stayed at the bars till 2, then he got up at 5 to run a half marathon and by the time I woke up wlhe was already back and drinking.
she left around the point i tried to tie her hair around my dick
we've coined the Sunday morning ritual of taking out our puke-filled trash cans as The Trash Of Shame
No, absolutely not. If you see that cunt, throw confetti or eggs at her.
That's a pretty extreme jump from confetti to eggs
whatever the appropriate amount of shots is to consider drunken acrobatics a good idea was a few less than I actually had
I'm using the house around the corner that my parents rent out to people as a means of getting sex. I just tell them I'm going for a walk and just invite my next hook up over
So far I consider it a great summer because I have had to buy Plan B a total of zero times
Also, I wish we had magnetic nipple rings and our boobs stuck together.
Your participation in the democratic process makes me horny AF
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