I cockslap morals
Nailed a drunk college girl before the CU game Saturday, and a drunk married woman after the Broncos game Sunday.
Some perfection is debatable.
i was like hansel and gretel. i puked a trail from mcdonalds to our place so i could find my way back in the morning
All I could understand from his text was "hatchet" "soccer" & "bitch". its safe to say andy has had enough to drink & will be violent soon
We need to reprogram your vagina to say "no"
Yea, I had a chaperone thankfully. I'm in the fetal position attempting to eat captain crunch now.
YOU COME FROM SAD WHALE FAMILY, DEEP IN OCEAN!
Yo, I can't just ask my mom where she relocated my vibrator to, can I?
jut tell him gently that you'd rather spend more time with his dick than his face
I'm so drunk. Liken realign drink
Like really drunk?
Or did you enjoy repositioning your drink?
I don't think my professor is going to remember the Halloween party... or the fact that he made out with a priest.
Why is it that the asexual in our group is the one that gets laid the most often??
I'm drunk but I just ate 2 heads of broccoli so does that mean it evens out?
Yes absolutlely
The beauty of his penis is distracting me from the fact that he was born after Princess Diana died
Left him blackout in the cab, gave 20$ to the cabbie and said drive until the meter said he wasn't getting a tip.
Bangkok has him now.
Randomize