New low: just hacked my moms facebook
pretend to be my girlfriend and sign me up for tool academy
im dirt poor will suck dick for halloween costume
You were doing downward dog and puking off my deck at the same time.
He offered to drive me out of state to meet up with my fuck buddy. Like best brother in law ever.
sick fucks of a feather flock together
I drove two hours just to throw up on myself today at the beach. My family saw the whole thing and my younger cousin cried
Im drinking ciroc out of an ice cream cone... my night is going fantastic
Ran into a tinder match at the bar last night. We spotted each other and started making out without speaking any words to each other. Fuck yea technology!
Uber driver offered to have sex with me since I went home solo. - rock bottom
Looks like it rained condoms in my room last night
How much of a thot would I be if I put this pic up? On a scale of thot-ish to Queen of Thotlandia
Throwing my sister a bisexual bachelorette party was the best idea ever. I made out with both strippers and the hot bartender promised to "gay marry" me if I take him as my date to the wedding.
She threw my purse across the room almost broke a lamp and this all started bc she forgot what an air mattress was
Did he pick you up in a mini van?
Yes. Turns out my sugar daddy is about to be an actual daddy
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