You can tell alot about a person by their poo.. For example, he was a smoker.
I wasn't fucked. I was just drunk, because i was still able to walk into the woods and masterbate.
yes he's amazing in bed. he made me like, black out. everything went black it was weird. so yes, i'd fuck him again. plus, he has every season of buffy on dvd
im pretty sure while i was fucking her my dog was fucking her dog too
at what point did putting a bag of doritos in the freezer seem like a really good idea?
You are the only person I know that goes to a bar enough to charge your iPhone there....
The house is trashed, there is porn scattered everywhere like an easter egg hunt and the blow up doll is sleeping on the couch downstairs. someone covered her up.
I almost puked on my graduation application. perfect.
Well I turned her sobriety into my own personal drinking game
I never thought I would have to arrest my own parents on a sunday night
I think I almost ran over some kid I went to high school with. Guilt factor: moderate to low.
Oh my god, are you sexting me while watching the Democratic debate.
100%
Now I'll never know if it was me that got you worked up, or Bernie Sanders' social policies.
I hope April is a better month for dicks. March has been very disappointing.
there is such a gross feeling of satisfaction when the married guy i used to hook up with likes my facebook status.
this strobe light makes my body turn on and off
Randomize