I'm skeptical of all drag queens.
we have officially mastered the walk of shame
Last night I went to an anything but cups party. I took a hummingbird feeder. It was a terrible decision.
and i had to drink on "never have i ever unsuccessfully tried to seduce a virgin ginger"
Bad idea. College students cannot afford both alcohol and a cat. Unless said cat is irish, and can feed itself with fifths of whisky.
Thanks for letting me rent out your vagina rec room. I don't expect the security deposit back.
Dedication to a hook up: I had to recruit five people at the train station to help me buy a ticket from a kiosk and get on the right train in 15 minutes because I discovered that my car was stolen.
I feel like I deserve an award for facing my fear of penises in my face.
Well I guess I'll go shower now and wash all the stripper off.
We started a fund for a baby in a wine glass, I think we're pretty responsible.
I'm sorry about all of the innappropriate shoe throwing
I SWEAR TO GOD IF SHE FUCKS WITH OUR GOLD GENE POOL
You put on a bike helmet, yelled "doesn't matter fuck it" then punched a stick the fire
Just taking a shit and realized the captain planet theme song is stuck in my head.
He was someone so memorable that I'd completely forgotten he'd existed up to and during the encounter
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