We walked 2 miles, legit 2 miles, and purchased 7 half gallons. One for each of us. Intense
Do you ever make guys send you dick pictures just cause it's hilarious?
She has an incinerator in her basement. Have you ever incinerated used condoms?
Lmao what?
It's a yes or no question.
new call of duty comes out in november. guess im not passing my finals
Of course she's mad at you. You Kanye Wested a picture of her catching snowflakes in her mouth. "imma let you finish but..." was the shaft and you put two of Kanye West's heads for the balls.
I feel like royalty, that girl from last night had a vajazzled vag. Bucket list complete.
I think this baby is eyeing my beer
Please God, is a penis possibly making it to vagina town to much to ask for tonight.
Not sure I just ate a really big pot brownie, I feel like my future is uncertain
Oh my god. I'm not ready to be an adult. I'm not ready.
Day 1 of "Death of a Liver" weekend complete. It came with flashbacks of horrible mistakes I made due to alcohol. I'm excited for how Sunday is going to turn out.
Please come home, i don't want to feel like basket garbage girl but I'm in your alleyway and not sure how to change that.
My boss and I ended up at the same strip club. We both got lap dances while talking about work.
Your drunk self managed to not pee on anyone's bed
Go me
I'm actually proud
So, I almost went hone with a French guy and a drag queen. Together. Then I became sober enough to realize, that's not my style.
Randomize
