The cab driver told me he hopes I look up to him as a father figure. Then he asked if I wanted him to take me to the hospital
Just had a stripper snatch my glasses off my face with her ass
went thru the pain of a Brazilian and he's passed the fuck out while i eat Doritos and watch tbs. fuck married life i want out
French people screaming and throwing stuff out the window. We told the manager and he's pissed and going up there. This is gonna be like cops. Maybe better than cops.
Its like "fucckkkkk yooouuuuuu" is echoing up my esophagus
tequila?
yep
Sometimes I wonder if my parents know that I mean horny when I say lonely.
That's the only definition of lonely that I know.
Just had flashback to me showering u with stir fry as u rythed on the floor
I think I just ate eggs off of a plate covered in cocaine.
Apparently it's bring your ugly annoying ass piece of shit slob of a baby day at work
You just said the word 'slut' out loud in your sleep and then made a moaning noise
How about we just have a naked taco night instead?
Just realized I'm still chewing the same gum post blow job. This Stride shit really has everlasting flavor. They should totally have an ad campaign based on blow jobs.
I'm so horny right now but I JUST put my fuckin lasagna in the oven
You're lucky I'm holding your vagina in my best interests
It was platonic naked porno viewing, I swear.
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