i watch way too much csi for them to even pretend to be my friend.
Do brothers usually kiss their sisters?
why is it that everyone in pennsylvannia gets fucking prego??
just scratched off #34 on my list of things to do before age 30 - drunk in a helicopter.
Are they hot? And are the slutty? These are my concerns for any wedding. You say yes, and yes, I will be your best man
I am dripping wet and slathered in glitter and banana mush. I love gay guys.
There's two girls at the bar sniffing each others boobs.
searching "dave" under the university of pittsburgh on facebook was not exactly how i hoped to find my baby daddy
Headed to the bar now. If I smell faintly of latex and tuna, it's just the new scent I'm trying.
Biggest penis I've ever pity fucked
broke the door off of my fridge tryin to have a indoor rodeo
After all the hair products he's stolen from me, he better fucking be gay.
One thing noone tells you about getting put in the drunk tank is do it barefoot. You get free flipflops.
I'm not sure how to explain it, but I feel like our penises have a connection. Like long lost brothers. We're not even gay.
What use have I for dignity? It just get's in the way of the really fun stuff.
Randomize
