we were watching porn and trying to copy the position they were doing now i think my hip is dislocated
well most of my day revolves around power hour
Fuck the gym. I just shaved m'cooch and my pants now fit looser.... Dont judge me.
just realized i can abbreviate thomas paine as t pain in poli theory class notes....YES
There's people holding up abortion signs everywhere. I guess the people of Florida want you to remember you fucked up on Spring Break.
I know it's not standard practice to meet the couple you donate to, but i'm curious as to what kind of people saw my picture and said, we want that girl's eggs
My neighbor just watched me eat a granola bar without pants, this is a whole new level of unemployed
i swear, as soon as they invent a cure for herpes, he's mine.
On a scale of 1-10 how seriously are we considering being sugar babies?
I'm about a 7.95
No more. You can't have nice things, and vodka is a nice thing.
hahahaha what do we need the kangaroos for? please tell me we release them instead of doves
i saw way too much penis for that to have been a funeral
I have not brushed my hair. I'm wearing a yoga hoodie. I look like I slept in a gutter somewhere. Today is going to be a good day.
I found a 9 minute video on my phone of you singing into an eggplant.
I think I've done enough damage with my vagina as of late, thank you
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