My e-date is really photogenic. Real-life not so much
We discussed how the marijuana was making the dopamine float around our nucleus accumbens last night when we were high. Yet another example of how our science classes are perverting our good times.
Two kids are drinking pounders in class. I think I'm hanging out with the wrong group of friends.
This is the 4 year anniversary of the last time I shit my pants. Let's get drunk...
we were both as far on opposite edges of my bed as possible this morning. id say work is gonna be a little uncomfortable from now on
theres a kid in a leopard robe and sunglasses filling up a gas tank. i miss college
The more and more I drink I keep rationalizing banging eye patch girl
hot buttered vodka was not a success. on any level.
im so hung over everytime my dog barks the sound vibration makes my whole body hurt
Hey, you can't rush the perfect creeper shot. I need buffer time to hone my skills.
Literally if she wants to make a big deal, I'd rather have shit smeared on my face.
What's clit gel and why is it in my wallet.
My husband just came over to kiss me and said, "careful, I got a block of cream cheese in my pocket"
Idk. The bad part of me thinks it's a good idea. The bad part is also the stupid part.
it's 1043 pm. still havent changed out of the shirt i wore last night so at this point i figure i'll go for twosies.
Randomize
