Who do you think planted the wheat? Who do you think cleared the land and killed off the native inhabitants? Women?
Do u kno any dealers?
I've officially lost all respect for you, dad.
i woke up to my roommate spraying cooking spray on my legs. fourth time this has happened. not cool.
It was honestly like finding a clitoris in a haystack.
So can you tell me who's underwear is on the cat?
haha it staarrted out with just getting drunk then it turned into sports authority. So now im 4th or 5th in line and shit faced. Help me
Drunk versus high capture the flag: what team is everybody gonna be on?
She liked to slap me in the face while she was on top. All I can say is that big boobs can excuse a lot.
I woke him up with a blow job and he started sing "oh the USAAAA. IT'S GOING TO BE S BEAUTIFUL DAYYYYY"
He was rocking just a diaper, shoes, and a gun. Sadly, I would still hit it.
We laughed. We cried. We came everywhere.
Haha. Fifty shades ain't got shit on me. My tits look like they got in a fight.
What do you expect from her? Do you remember that creepy man she dated who saturated a pillowcase in his musky cologne and mailed it to her and she still slept with him.
I am actually offended he hasn't asked me to sleep with him yet to get better grades...I wanted the whole college experience.
Honestly my life is shambles over a married man who looked like a fuckin NERD ON HIS WEDDING DAY
Randomize