His mom just asked me if I was "fooling around with her baby again" and then when I walked downstairs his dad YELLED "Look who's taking the walk of shame!"
You really need to stop fucking dudes who still live with their parents.
i told him im from Canada, abortion is free
I just asked the dr if it was herpes while wearing my shirt from the strip club...
I told you to stay away from the strippers in Oklahoma
He dared me to drink a bottle of olive oil in exchange for a 30 pack... So much for loosing the freshman fifteen this year.
She's going to get me a sippy cup for christmas. If I can't open it, I can't have any more to drink. Seem reasonable?
no one was sober enough to set up jenga so we just threw the pieces at the last person to drink
It wasn't so much skinny dipping. It more like skinny walking...through a fountain.
He tried to take a picture of me naked but only got my ass. I don't know his name but if my butt is a guys wallpaper, that's the one I boned.
I cannot even describe to you the most amazing ass I have ever had the pleasure of seeing walk up the stairs in front of me just now.
Just bought weed from the ice cream man. The kid in front of me got a tootie fruitie.
Hey douche face I just want you to know, if you ever got hit by a bus, I'd really miss you.
Only if you died obviously.
Dude come to her party. Someone just took a body shot of rubbing alcohol
I feel as though I look like a mom with a substance abuse problem
I was sending him tit pics while watching how to train your dragon 2. It was everything.
mate iv just woke up in the garden. either help me inside or bring out my vodka
Randomize
