Haha, just learned changing others iPhone passcodes is fun while drunk but not fun the next morning.
Everytime I cough, my tampon falls out a little bit. Does this mean I'm loose?
wanna get hammered and throw tomatoes at the people standing in line for the midnight showing of harry potter and yell whichcraft is evil
If it makes you feel any better, i gave her boyfriend a blowjob last week.
it was surprisingly calming to be rocked to sleep by his roommate humping on the bottom bunk
I still havent gotten an apartment yet, so I crash random college parties...get so drunk and then sleep on their couch
I will always remember today as the day I narrowly escaped having to touch a tiny penis
...i'd have to set their sheets on fire.
Double vision is so hot when a big dick is in sight. Thank you Bud Light.
Also, what is a socially acceptable way to introduce a crossbow in public?
"You can go raw dog up in me". Exact words. I can't decide whether to run, or fuck. Help.
Plus it's a good way to scope out guys. Have them fight for you, like real males do in nature.
i made the walk of shame wearing her booty shorts that said juicy on the back. i'm still counting it as a good night
my confident boosted when he told me that it was I who started making out with him. ME. NOT HIM.
I AM SHOCKED AND PROUD OF MYSELF
He’s only in town today and our afternoon sex sesh kept getting interrupted by the neighbor’s kid yelling and screaming in the pool
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