My Nuvaring birth control makes me queef.
I'm relatively certain my chiropractor just judged me for admitting that my back is misaligned from the sex we had last night...
Why do the people I hook up with still exist after we're done?
just walked into the study room and found an empty bottle of vodka and a passed out freshman. Did you have anything to do with this?
I fucked my cousin and caught chlamydia this year. I can't really harbour any illusions about myself anymore.
Mom called last night while I was at the bar and asked where I was. I told her I was on the highway to the danger zone while the guys were humming the top gun theme.
If I don't get to have sex with him soon my entire female reproductive system is gonna climb out of my body and choke me to death
I'm drinking with a guy who apparently blew my dog sitter.
I'm really tired of this guy walking his chicken in my neighborhood.
Oh, in response to your "does dating get better" question...I feel like penises are getting smaller nowadays. Its been several years since I saw a good 8+ incher.
I got to walk around for eight hours wearing power armor and acting camp. No way I wouldn't love it.
He just got really stoned and kept complementing my ponytail
I got fucked in a bat mobile this morning. Being slutty rules.
long story short, he tried to fuck me standing up, toppled over, and now I have four stitches next to my eye
There are only a few things more freaky than wandering around a zoo drunk.
Randomize