Shit chicky whatchu wearin rt now, ur skins?
Oh dear, kinda... in ur sweats!
U look good, r we getting naked in ur car?
went to the bathroom to piss, saw puke in the toilet thought wtf i dont remember puking, then turned around to find a chick i've never seen before passed out in my shower.
I wish I could put booze in boobs and store it for later. I wouldn't need a flask. For $7000, they should do amazing things like that.
I learned an important lesson this weekend.... I'm way to good at sex to travel for it. From now on he drives here...
everyone contributed. i held her hair back, he rubbed my vag... it was a team effort.
Yeah someone just put a trash bag that says "use protection" on the snow penis
We don't need a hotel, we'll just sleep in the post office.
She literally got down on all fours and I swear did a 360 degrees head rotation exorcist barf...and then moaned IT WAS THE TACO BEEEELLLLLL
so no, not her best night
We're looking for the removeable roof from her Miata. Winner gets a 40.
This is going to be the time I got green body paint on Chris' ceiling all over again...
I kind of want to throw a lot of things at him. Mostly blunt, heavy objects.
Well he offered to lick my asshole so...I'm not really worried about his interest level.
Did you know that chef boy-ar-dee was a real person? I watched a show about him. the history of the ravioli is more scandalous than you would think.
I apologize for there being a shopping cart in the living room. I don't know how why or where i got it.
you're not celebrating your 21st birthday right unless you give a male stripper a hand job, flash the bartender, and win a free vibrator.
Randomize
