we were doing it doggy-style and i felt him pop that pimple on my back.I have mixed feelings about it
There was blood everywhere. She was pretty good looking person though.
did mom hear me barking???
oooooh yeah. good luck explaining that one
sooo high. sooo many dog friends
and ive been naked for the greater part of the evening. alone, drunk, and naked. i think that is how all great interventions start.
You know you gotta reevaluate your life when the first thought that comes to mind after you wake up is 'at least I'm still alive'
I think he was trying to tie my clitoris in a knot with his tongue. So awful.
I knew full well that at some point during the night my penis would be out with this costume choice
He's like... An octopus that touches my vagina in all these diff ways at the right times. It's almost unsettling
I'm crying and shaving my Bronco playoff beard
At a bar across from the city police station. I PROMISE I will do something great.
We were wearing togas. So having sex was really easy to do without taking any clothes off.
This German chick looked me up and down for a while. Then she grabbed my crotch, let go after a few seconds, and said "you vill do". I think I'm gonna like tonight.
Quote of the night award goes to my father "I like wearing my swim trunks around the house because they are cooler and more blousy for my balls". Yay dad
You know when you're a kid and you play at the pool until you passed out? It was like that except instead of playing it was sex.
I don't know how I managed to chip the inside of my tooth w/ a turkey and cheeto sandwich, but I think that's what happened.
I'm sorry, a turkey and WHAT sandwich?!?!
Randomize
