so chris just stuck his hand between rachel's legs and yelled 'TROUT!' and we were like...you're wasted
So, I just sold my textbook to have money for Plan B.
idk but i have you stored in my phone as 'guy with beard doing body shots'
How do you get a black eye playing beer pong??
I have now added draft and wells specials that different bars have to my blackberry calendar.. Help me.
Just finished my quantum homework in ladies room writing with eyeliner. I am the party/physics champion.
Matt says that there are strip club auditions in our living room and he'd like you to audition.
Well anyways I still cant believe I don't remember such a monumental day in history as you showing me your boobs... Jesus
I really thought I'd be the only alcoholic drinking alone in my car at noon in the Lowe's parking lot. Passed out dude in the car next to me begs to differ.
he was like "can i get a kiss" and i was like "can i get a taco"
I'm cleaning my apartment while naked. Anyone who says that's not why they want to live on their own is lying.
Anyway. I unfriended all of these people like a grown up and I am never talking to them again
I'm pretty sure my munchies are the only reason Good and Plenty is still around
He doesn't have much of a personality but he makes up for it with his sexual prowess
keeper.
I got snowed in at my parent's. everyone's asleep so I'm smoking a joint in my old room and watching Tarzan on a 12" tv.
They must be so glad to have you home...
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