How come twittering sounds sexual?
Because of Bambi.
Girl next to me just said "as a guy I used to sweat but not I don't. it's awesome" Oh. My. God.
road dome is illegal, just asked in driving school.
She's like the little sister I never had ... except for the fact we're having sex.
Freshman just walked up and thanked me for letting him hide under my bed when the cops showed up to the house last weekend
If only guys knew how much awkward ass shaving goes into making sex this good...
When the cops knocked on the door, he just knocked back and announced "house keeping"
When I come over I'm bringing "Socky" the Alcoholism Prevention puppet, today he is going to tell you boys about his FAVORITE word---its called "moderation"
Just had flashback to me showering u with stir fry as u rythed on the floor
I love it. Like, more than my penis at the moment.
I DO NOT KNOW WHO SHE IS, WE HAVE NO MORE FRUIT, SHE CAN'T STAY HERE.
He wouldn't let me ride him with a Ninja Turtles hat on...
I have never lost more friends than while playing Uno drunk.
Sooo i'm debating posing nude for the drawing and painting classes, I just wanna see if they draw my nip ring.
Was I just dreaming, or was there a corpse at work last night?
She was just sleeping.
Is it bad that I'm kind of disappointed by that?
Randomize
