All I know is that if italians start TIME TRAVELLING were all in a lot of trouble paizon
i really wish facebook had an app for when you are looking at a chick's photo album, you could just skip to the ones where she and/or her friends are dressed like skanks
My friend's 9-year-old son just informed me that for a cop station, you can't use a shotgun; you have to use a machine gun. Thank you, Grand Theft Auto, for single-handedly corrupting our youth.
So all semester this guy and girl have been talking, and today is the last class and we are doing nothing. I would have skipped but I want to see if he seals the deal or pusses out. It's like a season finale.
we usually just have an Easter beer hunt and never end up at church anyways
What?? I'm covered in blood at the hospital, I atleast deserve a pic of someones boobs
I don't remember much but I know I looked hot.
she refused to get out of the dog cage till we sang "be our guest" to her.
Turned out the thing on the lampshade was a bloodstain, not a bedbug. We feel much safer now.
There's a creepy homeless guy with no hand trying to get up on our tacobell order
I think they were making kool-aid in my bed. There is lots of sugar and my hands and face are stained blue.
I like that we've become good enough friends again that I can make fun of your penis without it being awkward
It's the Ides of March, motherfucker. That means we're supposed to daydrink, right?
The guy I slept with in AZ just called and is moving here next week.
About that photo of the cake you just sent. You do realize it’s on a glass table, right? We can all see your reflection in it, and you’re very obviously naked.
Randomize
