Hey sorry i havent responded. i threw up on my phone while i was sleeping
They threw a beer at you on stage and then you stopped the karaoke and cussed everyone in the bar out for 2 minutes
I woke up to 30 angry texts and her Chihuahua in my room. Can you drop him off for me?
she said "feliz nobby job" then proceeded to give me a blowjob.
it appears as though my vagina has gotten the best of me again
was this before of after we tobbganned into that tree?
I'm making you a bingo card for hookups of the school year 2011-12 so you can make even worse life decisions next year
she's living proof man. somebody has literally pissed in the gene pool
nothing like smoking out of your roommate's bong with your mom to celebrate the rising of christ
he is risen halelujah
Jusy read on a science page that squeezing boobs can prevent cancer cells from forming in them, youre welcome.
Try to make ecstasy cheese. Capitalize on the molly and greek yogurt trends. MARKETING
Orgasms and cereal.... that's what life's about.
Just took an Adderall with Pedialyte so I think that's a valid answer to "how are you doing"
For the love of god, if any of you are up, bring me pants.
Caitlin, you were laying in your bed feeding your dog ritz chips and singing a whole new world at 4am loud enough your neighbors came over an asked you to stop.
I love my life
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