i am watching brooke knows best right now and hulk is totally dating his daughter's look a like. it is gross and disturbing.
the most pressuring question is, why are you watching brooke knows best?.
There is something about drinking on a golf course and getting with younger women that just really makes me feel at home.
never have phone sex with a hardcore republican during this health care crisis . just dont.
I just made a 90's Nickelodeon TV theme song power hour mix...I don't want to build it up but your head might explode
the bathroom floor of the diner looks a lot different when you're not rolling around and puking on it.
I forgot to tell you thank you for putting me out when I was on fire. im sure I'll laught about this someday...
hes either a crazy bad problem or a crazy good orgasm. I just can't decide which one.
its the kind of pain that only someone with a fucking elephant on their head would understand. I'm never drinking again.
I spent part of my valentines extracting candy hearts from a woman's vagina. The entire time I was thinking "this job pays for my Mercedes. This job pays for my Mercedes. This job pays for my Mercedes."
I'm about to fuck a girl in an old school Tony Kukoc Bulls jersey. About to earn my third championship ring in sex
I just spilled a shot of Patron on your mom.. Body shots may be happening. You better get here quick.
Ugh it's 2016, why can't our bodies just shed fat on their own
Of all of my friend's husbands, I like when yours hits on me best
Awe that means so much to us
Chili is not acceptable fuck buddy food.
Honestly no idea how dad figured out i did all that gay porn unless he was looking at gay porn.
Randomize
