help help how do i get him away from me should i talk in a robot voice or something
Why does lindsey know I was naked in the kitchen?
how hairy? two words: wookie tits
I'm getting very good at recycling my hook ups. So even though i'm having more sex... I'm the same amount of slutty.
Yes! I like to call that picking from the buffet!
These guys are walking up and down the hallway yelling, "Yo, is this the floor with the unisex bathroom?"
He is going overseas for 8 months, not only was that blowjob a going away present, but i was supporting the troops
You called in. Quitter. You stayed at home naked drinking again didnt you.
lets just use each other and get past this awkward stage. forget my name.
Let's just say that the best way to get a girls attention is not to slap her on the ass from the window of a moving cab.
i could have been the DD. this is ridiculous. i'm the most sober and getting the least ass.
think before you get married my friend it's my birthday and just got done jacking off
A hefty woman and I mean hefty shoved her number in my pocket at the gym without as much as a hello, winked and kept walking. Going to use your bed to defile her, don't want her to know where I live or have my neighbors see! Thanks, you're a pal!
It's a sexual break up. We maintain a friendship and leave any and all sexual attraction out. It's not hard, having a baby is harder than that.
I felt like a slutty ass cruella devil driving your old car, And I got in a fight with your wipers
Apparently his ex was into edging and did it to him so much that it takes forever for him to cum
I hate you and your multiple orgasm sexcapades
Randomize
