that's the type of pussy you go to the bathroom and wack off before you fuck her, just to last longer inside of her!
what age do we have to be before we can stop fucking guys on the first date?
According to Glamour magazine, experiencing sexual pleasure helps you live longer. I am dying an early death.
I want to leave work and go home and eat Five Guys and masturbate
Somewhere in this world my second husband is in 9th grade.
Talking to this girl is like playing minesweeper on hard. There's red flags everywhere.
You taught me that having a dip while u shit is awesome. I appreciate u for that
careful of the bathroom.... theres some drunken ninja turtles in there....
Dude that's beautiful. I've never heard of someone smoking with their bunny.
I feel like I have a connection with him. A marijuana-induced-spiritual connection.
Our relationship is representative of a cognitive bias that leads to bad decision making and misplacement of resources. So should we pick up some whiskey tomorrow?
They just keep looking funny at me. No one has attempted to tell me that I don't make sense though so maybe they're all way more high than I am.
I'm a grown ass woman, I need to get fucked
Bruh why you gotta judge
You're awake at 3:30 in the morning RSVPing to a musical, I'm well within my means
He bedazzled a shirt for me that said "best head giver" should I be thankful for the gift or concerned that he has a bedazzler?
She demanded to see my stimulus package, I had to go over.
Randomize
