She looked kinda like Mario Batali?
Come here. I'm drunk. Family Function. Intense Pro-life vs. Pro-choice debate. Bring Republicans.
Dude this girl just said she'd take me to pleasure town while giving me head
Will Ferrell is probably jerking himself off somewhere wishing he was you
You were in my dream and you got the lyrics to lollipop tattooed on your chest. Don't get it, it wasnt that cool.
Whoever decided putting Tom Seizmore and Heidi Fleiss together in rehab should win some kind of award.
It's the first day of summer. It's not a race it's a marathon. Pace yourself
Uh oh. Middle aged belly dancers. And they just got out swords. Shit is about to get real.
Oh eartly, In cocy youtu youchv make the wallflowers d tskunks!y, couch protection now,.sryou should feel special !
Those were some damn good pancakes you made last night.
Dude I've been in FL since Monday.
Apparently I pulled that girl's number while I was trying to insist my drivers license had enough money on it to cover the tab.
I woke up with jello shots in pant pockets so I must've had fun
Puking in the Ritz Carlton bathroom was actually kind of a nice experience
SPICY FOODS AND BLOWJOBS DON'T MIX.
YOU SAID YOU'D TRY ANYTHING ONCE YOU LIAR
I'd like to know who hasn't seen my tits tonight.
yes that’s a photo of a horny gay donkey
Oh I know. I’ve known many horny gay donkeys in my time.
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